Wheel Chair incidents..

Now, what you got to remember is this is called "Confessions from the Door".. okay?

hahaha Arse.

So this one club I was working YEARS ago, it was your usual busy Saturday night.
The line was long, the music was pumping, and everyone seemed to be having a good time. All of a sudden, I hear people yelling in the line.

I move towards the line to see what's happening, and all I see is people being bowled over. I looked down, and there is this white male, mid 30's, running over everyone in the line. At first I start laughing, but he keeps trying to go back and forth, and ends up mowing half the line down.

He rolls up to the front door and tries to go straight through. I stop him and tell him that he is to intoxicated to come inside. He looks at me and starts getting angry and starts swearing.

He starts calling me a black coconut, and tells me I should go back to my own country. He then starts yelling insults about my family.

So I start cracking jokes at him, and advise him he shouldn't be "Drinking and driving" hahaha He gets mad, and starts going around in circles (like he was trying to do a burnout in a wheelchair) hell, he even started grunting at the same time.

The head doorman then walks forward, leans down and tells the man to politely calm down and leave. Then out of now where, the guy in the wheelchair reaches up and starts to strangle the head doorman and starts calling us all black monkeys.

Now the grip of someone who uses a wheelchair is very strong, and it takes 3 of us, to try and get him off the head doorman. We manage to separate him from the head doorman, and the disabled man falls off his chair. He then turns to all of us and starts calling us porch monkeys, fat islanders, losers, and that our parents need to go back to where they came from.

The head doorman, grabs the disabled man's wheelchair, goes to roll it to him, but instead throws it in the air and smashes on the ground 10 meters away from the door. He then turns to the disabled man and tells him

"Get up and walk to your chair cunt"

Now don't laugh, but imagine a man, lying on his belly, crawling to his chair, and STILL swearing at us. He even crawled through some puddles.

I felt bad.. but I kinda laughed.

Im going to hell, and so are you if you laughed.

THEN THERE WAS THIS ONE TIME,

i was out drinking, me and my mate, and he is in the DJ booth. I see this girl sitting up on a seat next to him, so I go to walk up to him to give him a drink, and I don't notice the wheelchair. I trip on it and look around. Then I realise it belongs to the girl on the high chair. I then notice my friends hand, rubbing her leg..

Now this mother fucker KNEW that she had no feelings in her leg, and was being GRIMY on her hahaha

I walk off laughing, and sit down. He joins me 15 mins later, and the girl in the wheelchair rolls up with him.. now my mate is bigger than me, and this wheelchair girl is tiny. He stands up and starts dirty dancing with her, while she is sitting there.

He is pumping his pelvic region towards her face. I can't keep hiding my laughs, and walk off laughing.

As we are in the car later that night, I ask him

"Would you of had sex with her?"

He laughs, pauses and replies

"I reckon she would of giving me the best blow job"

hahahahahaha

Change your life.

And yes, he is a bouncer too lol